Beacon Of Guidance
Now, even scientists and doctors also say that [these things] effect children’s eyesight and their thinking which is why, within a span of 24-hours, children should not be allowed to use the internet, play games and watch TV for more than one hour But these days, since schools are closed
And studies have come to a halt due to the coronavirus children are mostly studying online In any case, there are such games which not only waste time but money as well They pay to purchase the game and then just as a person becomes addicted to certain things,
So too do children become addicted to playing games and cannot go without it While playing these games, immoral and indecent advertisements also appear When these advertisements appear as they are playing then the children’s minds are being polluted from a young age as a result
Then when they grow older, they go down the wrong path Therefore, parents should firstly be aware of the games which their children are playing or the programs they are watching on the internet or the TV and should supervise They should also supervise to ensure
That they do not watch anything outside of the allotted time It should be explained to them that their vision will decrease and their minds will be impacted and so it is better for them to read books instead which are better for the brain’s development
Aside from this, arrange different activities for them, speak to them, sit with them, hold discussions with them and if they still insist, then try to show them such programmes online or on the television which will improve them academically and spiritually and will also enable them to gain wisdom.
Thus, you have to do all of these things However, it is extremely important that the parents keep a close eye on what their children are watching If the parents themselves are not well-educated and the children, who are still studying are spending their time playing games and the parents do not show any concern
And are simply focused on their own issues then they will ruin their children Therefore, one has to exercise great caution in this regard and for this one has to strive and make a lot of effort Nonetheless, one has to keep a watch over them
And at times strict measures may also need to be adopted as well for the children but not by physically punishing them, rather explain to them in a loving manner and tell that they can only watch certain types of programme for such and such duration And those programmes where there is a possibility
That certain indecent advertisements may appear, should be blocked so that they do not even show up on your internet But even for games, there should be a fixed time You should tell them to go outdoors and play football or cricket, etc
But tell them not to pollute their minds by sitting in front of the TV and also tell them that they only have permission to watch TV for one hour However, at the same time, one cannot be too strict because in today’s society
If too much strictness is shown then that can also cause the children to go astray Therefore, explain to them in a loving manner and by establishing a relationship with the children so that children consider their parents as their friends and this can lead to better means of providing the moral training of children.
No, this certainly does not mean that the opinions of men have superiority over that of women Women also give sound opinions MashAllah, and it was based on the suggestions of women that certain decisions were made during the time of the Holy Prophet (sa). At the time of the Treaty of Hudaibiyah,
The suggestions presented by the men all failed, and it was the advice of Umm Salamah (ra) which the Holy Prophet (sa) implemented as a result of which, those Companions (ra) who were initially reluctant to offer sacrifices eventually offered their sacrifices. So, the Holy Prophet (sa) honoured the women
And took their opinions into account. For example, on one occasion, when the Holy Prophet (sa) was sitting in a gathering, a female Companion (ra) came and said that “men go for Jihad, “and are at the forefront of presenting financial sacrifices; “they do various other things and they perform worship as well, etc.
“whereas we [women] worship as well, but the men go out for Jihad “due to which they are able to attain martyrdom or they attain more blessings, “so will we partake of the same blessings?” The Holy Prophet (sa) looked to the Companions (ra) and said, “Is there any man or any person
“who can express the case of the women as effectively as she has done?” This meant that the Holy Prophet (sa) appreciated what she said. Therefore, it is wrong to say that only men can make sound judgements, and thus all of their opinions should be accepted.
This [verse] means that as heads of the household, men are responsible for managing the finances of the household and ensuring that the atmosphere at home is in accordance with the teachings of Islam. Islam also teaches that if a woman is earning wealth then the man cannot ask them
To contribute their wealth and assist with the household expenses. If women do not wish to spend their wealth on the running expenses of the household, then even if she is earning wealth it is still the responsibility of the man, as the guardian and head of the household,
To manage the finances of the household. This is also why as guardians, men are responsible to ensure that an Islamic atmosphere is brought about in the home so that proper moral training can take place. As for [domestic] issues, which take place in many homes,
I cite the following to those who are quarrelling that, “Men are guardians over women” which also means that when there are disputes between a husband and a wife, since men are guardians and possess greater physical strength as compared to women, thus they must exhibit patience and should not unnecessarily quarrel with their wives.
They should remain patient over the small and minor issues that arise, so the atmosphere of the home remains peaceful. This is what “guardian” means, that since men possess greater physical strength, they should remain silent thus maintaining a peaceful atmosphere at home so that the children can be brought up in the proper manner.
Men have been made guardians in order to fulfil their duties; they must fulfil their duties to their wives and children and doing so is what makes them guardians. You should offer your prayers in front of them and you should offer your prayers in such an excellent manner
That it develops a passion within the children to also offer prayers. I have seen many parents who offer their prayers in front of their children and when the children observe their parents, then they also start to pray. For example, young girls wear the scarf on their head
And start to offer the prayer with their mother. Or if it is a boy, then he wears a cap on his head and starts to offer the prayer, or simply just stands with the parents in order to pray. Therefore, you have to develop this passion in them from their childhood
And make them realise that this is an obligation which their parents are fulfilling and by looking at their faces they would be able to tell that their parents are deriving a particular pleasure and delight from their prayers and that they have never abandoned this practise.
Thus, children will develop an interest [for prayer] right from their childhood. If one demonstrates their practical example before the children, then they will also develop this passion. You should ensure that they continue to have a passion for this. You should continue to develop this interest in them by the age of seven.
That is why the Holy Prophet (sa) has stated that one should continue to draw the attention of children between the ages of seven and ten towards offering prayers. One has not been instructed to make them read it before that age, but they have been commanded to demonstrate their own example in this nonetheless.
So for three years [between 7 and 10] you should encourage them to pray at least two, three or four prayers. However, after the age of ten, you should tell them that they are older now and it is obligatory upon them to offer their prayers and so they must offer their prayers.
Therefore, it all depends on the example set by the parents and to what extent they have passion for the worship of Allah the Almighty and the manner in which they fulfil the due rights of His worship. When you yourself and the father of the child are observing prayer,
The child will naturally develop this habit as well. Have you understood what I have said? Or do you have any question that remains which you would like to ask? She is saying that her son is 11 years of age and he offers his prayers along with them.
They also have a daughter who is three years old and although she does not perform the ablution as such but she wears the Hijab [to pray] and stands with them. She tells her son that it is ok for her to do that,
But he asks why she is allowed to offer the prayer in this way and he is not. You should tell her that the prayer has not been made obligatory yet for your daughter. Therefore, if she stands along with you out of her own interest, then you should allow her to do so.
You should not be strict with her in this regard. Islam is a religion that is based on ease and does not make one endure difficulties. You should tell your son that “since you are 11 years of age, “therefore all the conditions and prerequisites of offering the prayer,
“such as performing ablution and how to correctly stand in prayer, etc. “have been made obligatory upon you. “This is why we tell you to carry out all these things. “It is not obligatory on our daughter yet, “therefore when she reaches the age of 11 or seven or ten,
“then she will also be told to take care of these things. “We will develop a habit in her from the age of 7 “and when she is ten years of age inshAllah, “then she will also be told just like we are telling you. “So do not worry.
“It is not the case that she is being given preferential treatment in any way. “When you were a child, we did not tell you to do this either “and similarly we do not tell her to do it as well.
“When she is of a similar age to you then we will tell her as well.” So teach your children like this in a loving manner. My question is regarding children who face cruelty at home and are separated from their parents and sent to care homes by the government.
What does Islam’s teachings say about this, and should the Jama’at establish similar children’s homes? The reality is that children who face such cruelty is because the parents themselves are cruel. The government has its own laws and regulations. If it is proven that the children are facing cruelty,
Then the government will take them away. Then we cannot do anything, as we do not have any governance. We are merely citizens, and as citizens of a country, we must abide by its laws. First of all, the blame rests with the parents; why are they cruel to their children?
They are committing sin and are answerable to Allah the Almighty. Allah the Almighty granted them the bounty of children, and they should raise them and bring them up in the right manner while tending to their moral training with love and affection. I have mentioned this on many occasions in my sermons and addresses.
If you pay attention, then you will learn how to properly raise your children. I have stated on many occasions that you should establish a friendship with your children and create a friendly environment, tolerate their behaviour, answer their questions and never inflict any sort of cruelty upon them, otherwise the children will go astray.
In today’s society where slogans for freedoms are often raised, children are also being incited towards freedom at school and in society in a wrongful manner. Of course there are justified freedoms, but there are others that are unjustified. Thus, when living in such a society, parents should be extremely cautious.
If it was within the scope of the Jama’at, then disciplinary action would be taken against those parents who are cruel to their children. If it were up to me, I would take disciplinary action against them. As for the government and social services taking the children away and keeping them at a social centres;
The parents should consider that when the government takes their children away, they will not care whether they are Muslim or Ahmadi Muslim or any other type of Muslims, Christian, Jewish, Hindu or belong to any other faith, they will simply keep them at their centre according to their own rules
And teach them that which is prevalent these days, which is that there is no God, religion is meaningless and they are free to do as they please. These things are so deeply ingrained that when children leave the social centre after an extended stay, they become atheists and no longer believe in God.
So the parents must consider that on the one hand, they came to these [Western] countries so that their children may obtain an education, become successful, so that they may have religious freedom and so that they may become active and contributing members of society; yet, on the other hand, they are being completely negligent
When it comes to the upbringing of their children. Then, when parents see social services taking their children away and teaching them according to their own standards, then they raise a hue and cry that social services has done such and such. The blame does not rest with social services, it rests with the parents.
They [social services] are simply acting according to the laws and regulations of the country. Moreover, those children are not their own. They take them away out of sympathy for them stating that, that the parents were causing them harm. However, they do not have the same pain for their moral upbringing
As a parent would have for their own child. The love and sentiments a mother has for her child, or a father has, unless in exceptional circumstances where one is a terrible father, or if there is a mother like this, but generally they have the most love in their hearts for their children.
At times they are strict with the children for the sake of their moral upbringing; and owing to the atmosphere around him or her, the child thinks that he or she is being treated harshly and unfairly. They then mention it to their colleagues in school or to the teachers.
Subsequently, those fellow students or teachers then involve the social services. The social services then monitor the child and if the child says that he is being wronged, then they will take the child away. Some children are psychologically unwell or some do not have enough understanding. Furthermore, their [i.e. the authorities] approach
Is that they are quick to take children away, especially from families of Muslim background and they think it is better to take children away from an Islamic and religious environment and put them into a worldly environment. This is thought to be the sign of progress nowadays. Right?
With regards to the success and progress of a nation, they think that if people move away from religion, they will succeed. The Jama’at’s stance is that the parents should reform their actions, otherwise the social services will take the children away; and the injustice done by the social services
In removing the children from their faith, the parents will be responsible for this injustice, in fact they will be guilty of this and sinful. Okay? Wherever it is possible for the Jama’at, they ought to help. In Germany you have established the Al-Nusrat Scheme. I do not know to what extent it is effective,
But one of its roles should be to open a care home for children and keep such children there; so that a religious environment can be established and you can ensure for their moral training. And with a loving resolve, they should be given both a religious and secular education;
And they should be looked after. Then, when the parents reform their actions, the children can be given back to the parents. This can only be done if the scheme is recognised by the government. Otherwise the government’s own organisations will take them.
I do not know what the rules are of the government in your country are, but if there is an opportunity to establish such a scheme privately, the Jama’at should certainly open something like this.